2019.02.06

Because everything I know I learned from books and TV, I just assumed therapy would be expensive. Of course, there were other reasons why it took me so long to go looking for help, but money is, always, the number one reason I don’t do anything.

Somehow, I forget that most of the books I read and TV I watch is from the US. And I live in a country with socialised medicine, which gives me many things for free.

When I was doing group therapy, I convinced myself I didn’t need a psychiatrist—even though many others in my group saw multiple doctors. I told myself, this is fine. I told myself I can do this instead of medication.

Medication costs money. The group therapy is free.

Turns out I can get appointments with a psychiatrist for free, too. And it turns out, I like to talk. I feel very dumb for not knowing this because I should’ve known this.

I’m a good teacher because I can talk off the top of my head. I’m a good diarist because my favourite topic is myself. (Followed closely by my country.)

Today was only my second meeting with my psychiatrist, but I enjoy them so much, I wish I could go every week. There’s a lot I need to talk about, which is, of course, why I have this blog.